1. |
Asleep In The Halls
03:55
|
|
||
I was silent on sunday as he prayed.
His hands just trembled; desperate for hope.
He says faith will send a chariot to claim him;
that's a little optimistic for the tenants he broke.
When he died like the others, they just rewrote history.
"He lived by the book, and died a good Christian man."
Conveniently forgetting all the bruises
his wife did her best to hide (with her makeup).
He said "God built this world out of nothing", but never did he say that with faith.
These people think that angels are crying for him every time that it rains.
But before the great flood, buckets of sand
just poured from above, and covered that man.
He sleeps in those halls, and I'll be damned
if it ever rains for him.
(---sell me something pretty---)
I found myself alone tonight below an empty city-
for hundreds of miles, don't it all look the same?
I'm sorry I ran. Mom, it hurts to know you miss me
but I had to take a chance at getting rid of his ghost.
I've seen him in my ashtray, he screams out of my whiskey
to remind me of the time that he cleansed all my sins.
Held me underwater until my little lungs were full,
and since I blacked out he got a miracle (when I woke up).
When he smiled and said
"welcome to heaven", I should have knocked the teeth out of his face.
I've seen straight through the dirty water
at the world he'd drown just to save himself.
No savior will stop the clock and its hands
from spinning him down to a plot in the land
and wrapping his skin in the fear that expands
from a scared little boy into the shape of a man.
I slept through his lies, and I'll be damned
if it ever rains for him.
no kingdom waits for him.
no tears were shed for him.
|
||||
2. |
Come Armageddon, Come
04:09
|
|
||
You traced a heart into the middle of my chest-
I don't mind that it's anatomically incorrect.
Black hair like velvet, and your eyes are lost in space.
I woke to find the biggest smile spread across your face...
You've had the worst this world can give. (avert your eyes)
I hid the best from you, but never did it well enough. (innocence dies)
I found those drugs too revealing for my taste; (let's close our eyes)
illuminating parts of me I can't erase
and you said,
"Hold me for a moment and I'll sleep.
I'd close my eyes, but tonight I'm far too deep
inside my mind- I sleep best when I'm alone.
Until now, I've never been in love."
(until the day we meet again)
The air is sweet.
I guess your touch has brought me home (misguided me)
to Desolation: this place I've only known of (is in a dream)
I mapped my treasures out of lines in your face (are you a dream?)
but they all led me, led me right back to this place
where you said,
"Hold me for a moment and I'll sleep.
I'd close my eyes, but tonight I'm far too deep (it's sink or swim)
inside my mind- I sleep best when I'm alone.
Until now, I've never been in love."
(until the day we meet again)
(pull all your pain from my womb. pull meaning from everything)
Push me hard enough to lose my feet.
The rocks below will tear my body and I'll sink
into your ocean, finding peace I've never known.
Embrace the shroud (do you believe in Heaven?)
that circles down. (do you believe Armageddon will come?)
and further down. (come Armageddon, come)
much further down. (come, Armageddon come)
I've never been in love.
|
||||
3. |
Pamela Hoy
03:58
|
|
||
January, 1999.
I brought my kodak and packed a flashlight.
The door stays locked 'til I climb in through the window.
I heard they found your body last year.
It was wrapped in a blanket- they couldn't stay here
where the closet still holds your clothes
(and your distant memory).
I'll set my things on your living room floor.
Investigate the cabinets, dig through the drawers.
Looking for an answer in the nothing left behind-
did your husband steal your life?
I've seen your watercolors.
Your face is blurred in my mind.
If you speak
Pamela, I'll hear.
It really would make a good song:
you're confined to your resting place, I'm living on my own
with quite a few miles in between
(and seventeen years).
I haven't felt much like myself.
I've been drinking, I've been smoking and living on a shelf
since the asshole at the station said your case had gone cold,
you never left my mind.
I've seen your watercolors.
Your face is blurred in my mind.
If you speak
Pamela, I'll hear.
Because nothing comes close to the truth
that I knew as I walked through your house.
This silence has taken me everything but home.
|
||||
4. |
Valentine's Day
03:55
|
|
||
You reached the bottom of your cereal bowl,
gave your milk to the cat, your coffee's cold.
Can't take your eyes off the news feed scroll-
that keeps him off your mind.
"Took a trip to the coast with some friends"
but you're smart enough to know he's just taking the piss.
Isabella's excited for her new face lift-
his eyes are on the prize...
When you scorched the earth, it was all for show
'til he salted the ground so nothing would grow.
Put your heart on a totem pole-
he was only passing time.
But it's not like you to cry like this.
You've got his credit card- go make yourself rich.
Who cares if he's high now, or dead in a ditch
when your friends are bringing wine?
Just don't let him make you old.
If you choose to sleep on a bed of nails, you might wake up alone.
The reason that you lost yourself was never lost on me-
you pour yourself into dirty cups to stagnate,
they leave you empty.
|
||||
5. |
A Deeper Blue
03:16
|
|
||
Two short nights on the eastern side of asheville-
that's all it took to clear my cloudy head.
The stars shine bright- for me they shine eternal.
they're cutting holes into my tired eyes.
this doesn't have to change.
I'll make the weekend last forever.
I wont forget the game of chess
or the way she compared it to the sunlight,
to the rain: we are the changing of the seasons.
we make our moves until we're put away.
and I'm so ashamed of taking her for granted.
her beauty is opaque.
I know you want to be forgiven
but I'm two steps ahead of you now.
You never had a choice in the cards you played.
Remember when we were kids, with our dream of starting a band?
We never did quite make it to Japan
but none of that has to change:
we'll reconvene in letters
and reminisce on days we spent writing songs, killing time.
Remember the sunshine follows rain,
the cold won't last forever.
Spring will come, then we can start again.
But I'm so ashamed of how we let you suffer
and bleed out on the stage.
just know i miss you, man.
more than i can say.
but nothing in me comes close to your pain.
|
||||
6. |
Lucky Charms
04:24
|
|
||
The sun shines through you: emerald green
as you hang from the branch of your lover.
Just one mistake (or a windy day)
will send you spinning to the ground to rediscover
how the sidewalk will smile with every step that you take
(while he's breaking the back of your mother).
Those stupid games we played as kids...
I'm older now.
I'll admit I'm afraid.
I keep telling my mom that I love her.
[ ... ]
I swear I knew you,
if I've ever known anyone.
But people change (and ten years is a really long time).
I knew I still liked girls, but I liked you too.
I was certain that I could tell you
anything (but that).
You asked me to play for your wedding,
but the words came out desperate and afraid.
Were you screaming from the future (distorted by time)?
Is it really a consolation that you traded this life for an awkward disguise
that you found hanging in the closet?
Now the sidewalk will smile with every step that you take
(while reducing your colors to winter).
Seasons changed the way we did.
We're older now, I admit I'm afraid
that even to myself I'm a stranger.
[ ... ]
|
||||
7. |
Morningstar
04:06
|
|
||
I've watched as you scream without making a sound.
Your air of discontent just drew storms all over town.
Did they ever have a grasp on pain that you felt
'til the day that you fell
and the sun fizzled out?
I've felt like shit for the past couple years,
now I let your memory guide me
to touch the keys
and try to believe that I might feel anything.
I walk down the stairs through the doorway of my mind
and every time I try, you look far less like yourself.
This feeling's so bizarre as I forget your face.
Your laughter fades away.
Your features start to melt.
But we can't let them speak on what they don't know
(or on situations they won't comprehend).
It's not their fault, those fortunate ones...
but I'm all out of sympathy for them.
|
||||
8. |
|
|||
I never meant to call so late,
but tomorrow I'm leaving for Nashville.
There's this fear that I've been trying to put into words,
but lyrics just won't appear.
everything is too unclear.
Airports have a way of making me feel invisible until I speak.
or maybe it's more like I'm suspended in time:
watch the world move along without me.
consciousness with no body.
The window in the terminal is only a mirror.
A silhouette reflected as these planes disappear.
they give themselves up
to the blackness.
to the black sky above
I met this lady who left home today without a word to her family.
She said "living is starting to feel like act, and I'm getting sick of the script".
I can't say I blame her, I've been there myself:
some circles just come to an end.
We all wanna live out our days in reverse,
'til we can be naive again...
until we're naive again.
The window in the terminal is only a mirror.
Every departure is the emptiness I feel.
i had a dream of home
and woke up more alone
than I ever thought was possible
|
||||
9. |
Tiny Dancing Doll
04:37
|
|
||
You found me in your dream
(the same way you did when we met)
the words past your lips were silenced on your fingertip,
and floated into space.
I carved them into stone inside every song I've made.
Death is a slow parade.
I'll fall in line someday and walk beside you.
Tiny dancing doll, don't you spin out of my hand.
Headline of the day says you found your place to land:
Spilled across the floor, now I understand:
you carried that weight so long.
Some small bouquet-
gathered for their beautiful display.
So child-like:
cicadas will sing
from the tree to their lovers: "come find me in the leaves."
Through the night,
a few cicadas still sing
just for birds to devour in the morning.
Tiny dancing doll, watched you spin out of my hand.
Shattered hourglass: all that's left of you is sand:
spilled across the floor, now I understand
you carried that weight so long.
|
||||
10. |
Dolphin Hotel
04:13
|
|
||
we're making it a habit to say those three words.
i don't think you do.
i'm not sure you ever have.
you lit the match and cried as rome fell.
identify yourself within the songs that you create.
writing and rewriting 'til they all sound the same.
the magic to your madness was lost along the way.
tonight the sheep man will come.
i tried to recall what i used to feel
when your smile held diamonds that no one could steal.
split by a memory, you no longer share his face.
i watched you disappear and burn to death.
we'll talk about the future but it won't be like before.
no promise of "forever";
that was never any more than the weakest song you've written.
the muses never come when you're smiling.
so fall into your sadness: that nothingness you seek.
it's binding you to pictures and to distant memories.
romanticize the past but never wonder why
our film slipped off the reel.
because nothing lasts forever: no, it won't be like before.
your eyes are boarded up.
your heart is like a door;
swinging open for the strangers to validate your pain.
i'd know because i was one.
as time takes everything lighter than steel
the sky will grow dark; the daylight surreal.
twist that into song and fall in love with an idea.
i know that's the best you can do.
i know that's all you can do for me.
i watched you disappear and burn to death.
|
||||
11. |
World's Fair, 1893
03:38
|
|
||
Oh, if I could be frozen like the girl in that Renoir:
To live inside a moment: a sky that won't grow dark
(not until the painting disintegrates).
The circular motion of an endless day
makes the centerpiece to that landscape
only count the days until the fair.
Six months flew by the same as they came.
We fall into our routines.
The eyes of strange men penetrate your frame:
you know you won't grow old like us.
Remember how you lived my life? (I lived as you)
Sycophants to Edison; we were the mariner's tattoos.
As impressionists we took our time to make the sunlight glow.
How quickly the sun did set when no one even noticed it was there.
Six months flew by the same as they came.
We fell into our routines.
The eyes of strange men penetrate your frame:
you know you won't grow old.
|
Canary Complex Raleigh, North Carolina
Canary Complex is the visual kei solo project of Flood District guitarist Canary Kasey: baroque sounds inspired by
impressionistic, soft oil colors and ever-changing moods.
The sophomore album "The Tragic Dance of Dying Leaves" was released on March 31st, 2023.
... more
Streaming and Download help
If you like Canary Complex, you may also like:
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp